What Depression Can Become

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Having experienced first-hand what depression feels like, I couldn’t help but frown upon the information that’s out there. Sure, we all know what depression is since it’s become such a significant phenomenon in recent times, but what I’m not sure whether people truly understand what it can become. I feel that the understanding of depressions scope is one dimensional. When you ask people about what depression feels like, their response is going to be somewhat similar. You would hear things like it feels like having butterflies in your stomach, panic attacks, mood swings, headaches, and other related symptoms. Though all this information is more or less correct for most people, it does in many ways diminish what depression can become.

Depression, a Physical Condition?

Having gone through several mental health problems including depression, my response to the above question is simply that it’s highly subjective. In the summer of 2006, during my summer break, I felt symptoms that mimicked an acute sinus problem. Having never had any problems with my sinus, it was naturally quite puzzling for me to accept. However, the symptoms were as clear as they could be, and the next step was to get a paranasal test to confirm the symptoms.  Surprisingly, the test results were clear, and the physician was as surprised as I was. I left the physicians room more confused about my health than ever, and my mom soon exited the room along with the prescription paper. I was curious to know what was written on that piece of paper because as far as I knew he wasn’t sure what it was. I opened the paper, and the drug that he prescribed was Fluoxetine. I Googled the medicine and read about how it was prescribed to depression patients. It was the first time I have ever heard of the term depression, and I when I asked my mom about it, she simply dismissed the possibility of it happening to me. She was never a fan of doctors or the pharmaceutical industry, due to her past experiences and simply told me to forget about it. She was unaware of how to converse with someone with depression, as she had never experienced it in her life. Nevertheless, I did what I knew best which was to endure whatever the condition was and hope it got better. It, unfortunately, did not get better, but I was able to adapt to the pain and felt like I had to live with it. A couple of years later, I felt a sharp pain in my chest and cramping all over my body. The next day I felt a burning sensation in my chest, had trouble swallowing food, chest pains, pain in my eyes, muscular cramps, and acidity. I told my parents about it who scheduled an appointment with a gastroenterologist who asked me to get some tests done to ascertain the issue. He was convinced that this was a case of peptic ulceration and that the tests would confirm this. Shockingly, again the test results came out clear though to my amazement the doctor was not at all surprised. He told me that the problem was not with my stomach but with my head. On his advice, I consulted a psychologist and began my long road to recovery.

The biggest take away though from the story is that if you feel that depression cannot translate into a physical condition, then you’re sadly mistaken. It is one of the most varied conditions and can result in things that you would never have imagined. At the same time you also need to understand that you are not alone in your battles either; therefore you should never shy away from seeking the proper treatment to try and revive the will to live again.

photo credit: Gaia Li Mandri If only via photopin (license)

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